Can you pass me…? vs Give me.。。

Nobody likes to be dominated by others to do things, so sometimes it’s not so simple to get what you want to directly. But if you can choose to use some requirement instead of the statement that sounds like a command, such as not using “Give me the newspaper”, but use “Can you pass me the newspaper?”

Could you give me five minutes? vs Go away。

When you are very busy, but at the same time your colleagues want you to give him/her a help… When you are too busy to pay attention to other things, it’s not suitable for you just saying “Go away!”. But it will be very different if you can say like this: “Could you give me five minutes?”

Excuse me. vs Move。

It is very rude to say “Move out of the way” with others, and most of the time, you will be rejected by them. But if you can say “Excuse me” when somebody is in the way next time, I think you can avoid the unhappy things happening, and get the result what you want easily.

I’m afraid I can’t. vs No。

Sometimes, it is very hard to reject friends’ invitations. And that sounds mannerless if you just reply them with “NO!”. If you don’t want to offend others, but also don’t want to accept his/her invitations, you can say “I’m afraid I can’t.”.

I would like… vs I want.。。

It is usually thought of mannerless when you are going to ask others to give you a help with “I want …”。If you can try to use “I’d like a cup of coffee, please” instead of “I want a cup of coffee”, the result will be different. What you can receive will be not only the coffee, but also a warm smile.

Would you mind…? vs Stop it!

When somebody is doing something you do not like, sometimes it may be very rude. Then how should you do to stop them? If you want to receive the result what you want, so you should not shout at him/her with “Stop talking on your phone in the cinema!”, just say with them mannerly, “Would you mind not using your phone in the cinema, please?”。

Can you hold, please? vs Wait。

When we are making a call, it would be very different with the result, if you choose to make it by manner or mannerless attitude. If somebody makes a call to ffind aomebody, please don’t just day “ Wait!”, you can say “Can you hold, please?”。