Learn to be a Good Listener
This Weekend, I enjoyed a mind relaxation under the teachings of Buddhism; he teaches me that nothing, in fact, is lost in the universe. We are nothing special but just compost of that which is around us, we are just the same as everything else. If we try to destroy thing around us, we are destroy ourselves; if we cheat others, we just cheat ourselves. Everything is continuously changing; life is a flowing river, with limited scope but unlimited potential toward the future.
Buddhism teaches me to learn to listen different voice, when I was in meditation, I reminded me of these past years that I was just a terrible listener in every possible way, somewhat a passionate, egotistic ,stubborn and arrogant actor throughout my nearly 7 years of professional experience for sure.
I always tried to persuade my conversational partners that I put forward some useful concepts and “I’m going to demonstrate that my concepts are right and effective, I do not act blindly in my own way”, rather than it, I was a hard-working reformist, I wanted to create a good atmosphere and lead ahead, then, the purpose of convincing people of my concepts will be achieved.
Last week, I read the story tells the Siddhartha’s enlightenment experiences, it said:
Siddhartha used to sat under the Bodhi tree in deep meditation for 6 years, he had finally realized the cause of suffering and how to remove it, he gained the most supreme wisdom and understood things as they truly are. He became the Buddha.
My enlightenment cams from the above-mentioned story that best way to be the better human beings is to learn to listen voices from outside and inside, finding the balancing point between different voices in a compassion and comprehension manner. Now just looking back to the past days, I was only trying to understand what others were attempting to convey to me. I wasn’t trying to find the balancing point, in a different perspective.
As time goes by, I find that I was lost in a confined box, in where I got less and less time to have a deep and kind conversation with others. I was accustomed to meditate lonely and act blindly. Not to mentioned that I was indulged and fascinated in delusion and sensual desire.
Thanks for your instruction, my spiritual mentor.
Now, I learn that listening for comprehension and compassion helps me get more than information, it helps me learn to respect others, I must changed ultimately, try to become more relaxed in what I was doing and to be more patient and open-minded, to focused on comprehension of what others expressed and grasp the cause and effect of different opinions will result in.
Now, I learn that a conversational atmosphere will be very important for a partnership, teamwork, trust and respect, we must ignore and abandon of bullying and self-centered tendency. I try to encourage my conversational partner we can and will have an enjoyable talking, we can share information, listen to facts, logic and reach out a balancing point and make a well-formed conclusion.
As time goes by, I am making a little progress and more and more compatible and mind-relaxed in my acting way in daily life.
In the next days, I will also get to ask myself for the facts of getting to be a good listener.
As Buddha tells me that I need to ask myself for the four questions in days in and day out.
What’s wrong with me?
Why am I in such a state?
What will change me?
What do I have to change?
In conclusion, I learned that to be a good listener, actually, is to be a good human being. That is to have right view, right thought, right speech, right conduct, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness and right concentration.
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