Apple Watch 的发布,引得很多朋友吐槽“这不就是 nano 带个手表带么!”当所有人都在讨论到底谁会喜欢这东西,我来告诉你苹果公司的穿戴设备多么符合国情。
After the release of Apple Watch, many Apple fans tease that it is just a nano with watchband! When all people discuss who would like this device, I’d like to tell you how Apple’s wearable device is consistent with our national circumstances.

——苹果手表
Apple watch

俗话说的穷人玩车,富人玩表。394 美元对于工薪阶层来说就是看来要饿上几顿了。
As the saying goes, the poor like cars and the rich like watches. The price of USD 394 is really a little expensive to the the rich.

来想象个场景:
Imagine this scene:

同事甲:“Hey 哥们你看老板新换的的百达翡丽!”
Employee A: “Hey buddy, look at the boss’s new Patek Philippe!”

同事乙:“百达翡丽能发邮件么。”
Employee B: “Can it send email?”

老板:“小乙,那个 XX 报表你发给我看了没 ?”
Boss: “B, have you sent the XX Statement to me?”

……明儿你就看到老板换了个 Edition 系列。
……Next day, the boss wears a new Apple Water Edition.

老板:“同志们,你们要养成看邮件的习惯!”
Boss: ”You guys must build the habit of checking emails!”

——苹果手铐
Apple cuff

苹果公司的 Apple Watch 设计者真是贴心!默默设计了两款表壳尺寸: 38 毫米和 42 毫米。小的给老婆,大的给老公,真是完美情侣表!
How considerate Apple Watch designers are! They give the watchcase two sizes: 38 mm and 42 mm. The smaller one is for wife and the bigger for husband; what the perfect his-and-hers watches!

暂且不说 Apple Watch 是否拥有密码功能,如果要设置了一个和你手机一体的密码的话,不好意思你的女朋友终会一起攻破。
Regardless of whether Apple watch has the password protection function, if you set a same password with your mobile phone, you girl friend will finally crack them.

身为男人的我们可以有一个万能的理由忘记回复信息:哎呀宝贝,刚太忙了没看见呀!可当你拥有了 Apple Watch,里面有个叫 TapticEngine 的东西。它能轻轻戳你的手腕!
As a man, we have a always useful reason for forgetting to reply messages: sorry baby, I was so busy to see your messages! But when you have an Apple Watch, an element in it called TapticEngine will gently poke your wrist!

朋友甲:“哥们你手腕咋肿了?”
A: “Hey buddy, what’s up with your wrist? ”

朋友乙:“…………”
B: “……”

Apple Watch上还有个叫 Activity 的 app,是为了检测你一天的走了多远,运动了多少。
And there is also an app named Activity to detect your walk distance and amount of exercise.

当你刚刚牵着一个漂亮 MM 从百货商店逛出来的时候,你的 Apple Watch 就来电了:“老公啊,你在干嘛啊,你不说在开会么,开会怎么走了那么多路啊?”
When you walks out of a department store with a beautiful girl while holding hands, your wife may call you via Apple Watch: “Honey, what are you doing? Are you having a meeting? Why are you walk for so far?”

接着你想到我脱了手表不就简单?Apple Watch 的心率功能不会放过你。“老公你没事吧!!是手表坏了么?”“老公!回电!”“老公!”过了一会你就发现一辆 120 停在你公司楼下,求护人员冲进你的办公室。
You may think that you can take off the watch. But the heart rate detecting function will let you do this. “Honey, are you OK!! Is the watch out of work?”, “Honey, call me back!!”, “Honey!”, and after a while, you will see an ambulance parked in your company and the ambulancemen rushing into your office.

从此 Apple Watch 界流行了一句话:“哥们,麻烦你帮我戴会表,我出去下!”
Henceforward, a saying will be popular in the circle of people wearing Apple Watch: “Hey buddy, could you please wear my watch for a while, I need to go out!”

你以为这就结束了么?这块手表还支持基本的 iphone 应用,比如短信,电话,邮件。例如你给他发的短信会直接出现在手表上,为的就是让用户马上看见。
It’s over? No, this watch also support basic iPhone apps, such as SMS, phone, email. For example, the SMS sent to iPhone will be directly displayed on the watch to ensure the user can see it immediately.

当你在和老婆坐在沙发上看电视剧的时候,猛然手表一亮:“哥哥~ XX酒店 302 房 我等你哦~”然后………………
When you and your wife are sitting on sofa watching a TV play, and your watch lights up and shows this message: “Honey, Room 302, XX Hotel, I’m waiting for you~”, then ……

—苹果作弊器
Apple cheat

我还记得我大学时代的时候还是 nano 时代,有几个壕带着一块名为 nano 的手表进入考场,简简单单完成那些需要俺通宵几夜背下的东西。
I remember when I was in college, it was still the nano era. At that time, a few students from rich families worn watches named nano into the examination room and easily complete the papers while I had to study several whole nights to pass the exam.

这就是我觉得苹果最强悍的营销手段就在这里:当高考出现禁止带手机和 Apple Watch 进入考场,这绝对是一场苹果式的胜利!
This is the most powerful marketing of Apple, I think: when mobile phone and Apple Watch are forbidden to be brought into rooms for college entrance examination, it is absolutely the victory of Apple!

From: The Huxiu
Translated by Steve, CCJK Technologies Co.,Ltd.

In case of any mistakes, queries or advice, please send emails to [email protected]. Many thanks!

Read Also: We Are Poor! Can’t Afford iPhone 6,Let Along the Upcoming iPhone 6S!!